Holdin' on..

March 27, 2010

Hold me closely.. I’m afraid I’m losing my grip..

Self-condemnation. I have been fighting this battle for so long. I won several times. And so I thought “winning” would be enough. But I was wrong. Indeed, I was. I came to a point of realizing that wounding my opponent and ignoring it afterward could never make me a champion for it would keep coming back every time it recovers. Worse, I’m giving it’s boss an opportunity to think of a better strategy.

Problems. If problems could buy a car, then you might see me driving different cars everyday. Though I know they always exist, I have lot of this lately. Last sunday, I preached about PAIN. I entitled it “UNLEASHING THE BEAUTY BEHIND THE PAIN” and I didn’t know why the topic seems so familiar that time. Little did I know that I’m on the track. I failed to notice that God is unleashing the beauty of the pain to me, not to the people listening to me. And maybe that’s why I felt so burdened.

And the result? Hmm. Simple. I started losing my grip. *sigh*

I kept on telling myself to be calm and increase my faith but I couldn’t help but doubt. In all areas, I did everything for the sake of compliance. And again, I was about to quit. But just when I thought I couldn’t stand.. He picked me up and made me walk.. again..

Lamentation 4:22 - “O Daughter of Zion, your punishment will end; he will not prolong your exile. But, O Daughter of Edom, he will punish your sin and expose your wickedness.”

I have sinned so I deserve punishment but His grace is abounding so He promised it would be temporary.

*After going through.. there will be..

PERSECUTIONS PROGRESS

*After having.. I will experience..

ARGUMENTS ACCEPTANCE

*After conquering.. I will be an

IDLENESS INFLUENCE

*And after the feeling of being.. I will be

NEGLECTED NURTURED

Just when I thought I couldn’t stand..

..you picked me up and now, I’m walking again..